OMG!!!! Patty Had Tom Killed!!!!!

if you dont know what im talking about then we cant be friends.

Stop The Fucking Presses!!!!!!

so this hot piece of wangbone (are you still out there moji??) is matt bomer.


and hes on this new show white collar which is fucking amazing.


and this is what he looks like shirtless.


and while i was watching it my ass was puckering. but it was a sad puckering cause of course hes straight and theres no way in hell my ass would get to suckle on his matt boner. right? wrong!!

because according to perez hilton not only is he gay but hes out too!!!! oh. my. wangbone.

now how he manages to be an out and proud homosexual without my knowing it i havent a clue. cause ive been ogling him for years now on traveler and chuck.

sadly according to perezy he has some big wig pr boyfriend. i cant find a pic of him but im telling myself hes old and ugly and matt will run away with me soon enough now that he has a job again and doesnt need to be a kept boy toy anymore.

interestingly bomeys wiki says hes friends with zachary quinto. they went to college together.

now i wouldnt want to imply that quinto is gay too.


not at all.


but. if youre going to experiment with homosex in college. why not do it with matt?



if you want to thank me matt give me a blow job and then use your spit as lube to fuck me.

and now some pics of my new lover.

someones in the perfect position to get his dick sucked.


or to blow this fag.


i hope hes not a bottom cause he sure looks like one here. someone could easily come up behind him and slide a dick in his ass.


shall we play whose hole is puckering? im guessing the sex & the city cocksucker on the left.


hes so dreamy!


those eyes are mesmerizing. i would let him fuck me in any orifice he wanted. he could fuck my nostrils if he wanted to. dont look at me like that. you know youd give him a nose job too.


whoever brings matty to me like this ill let you watch while he fucks me.


ta cunts!

Thinking Made Kelly's Brain Hurt And Monday's Gossip Girl Finally Convinced Me That I Want Armie To Hammer My Ass.

warning this is a telly post. if you dont want to listen to me rant like a school girl about all the shows giving me wood this week than move right along.

so i didnt get to watch gossip girl on monday and instead watched it last night along with 90210 and the real housebitches of nyc. and after the marathon of awesomeness that ensued i just may make a habit of it.

first the housewives. watching kellys brain spasm pretty much gave me the biggest cum shot of my life. really. watching two women has never given me as much pleasure as that fight did. i dont know if this was faked or not but. wow. here's a taste.



so basically kelly is...kelly cant really be put into words. but ill try. so to break this down for you in gossip girl speak kelly is georina, bethenny is blair (but slightly nicer), and this whole thing can only end one way...



speaking of gossip girl. how uh-fucking-mazing was that episode????? armie hammer shirtless? yes please!!

i really want to suck on those nipples. they're calling out to me.


and this is where im about to put my ass on his face. see how happy it makes him.


serena you know i love you. when you fucked nate (who looked especially hot last night) i admired you. when you made love with dan i was slightly perplexed as to why you gave up the pretty pink penis for that hairy beast but he looks like a spanker so i understood. but if you dont get your hands off my man i will pull that blonde hair right out of your head!!


fucking on. so if you ever wanted to know what magical word turns a recently reformed bad girl back into her bitchy self its blair. just remind her what evil, conniving, backstabbing slut had her banished from her kingdom and all that revolting niceness disappears. at least thats what they'd like us to think. turns out next week shes being nice to blair. yuck!



but whether her evil side comes out to torture blair or the shows newest villainess poppy i dont really give a shit. as long as georgy unleashes her evil on someone, anyone, ill be happy.

speaking of evil. what the fuck is going on with 90210? over the last few weeks its gotten really good. between silver going bi(polar), donna martin totally living up to her reputation (i never watched the old show but everyone seems to cream themselves over donna), and most importantly liam making my hole twitch (he talks and i cum) i find myself suddenly enjoying this show. and dont even get me started on naomis sister. shes a crazy bitch who sleeps with her little sisters boyfriend and while that totally sounds like something my sister would do to me i love the bitch. keep it up 90210!!

LC's Leaving But Who The Fuck Cares? Kristin Cavallari Is Back!!

so perez hilton says that krisin is coming to the hills and i could not be happier! kristin was the hottest bitch in laguna! and all the boys wanted to fuck her puss which of course means i wanted to be kristin. and while i finally accepted lc as the resident reality tv queen i could not be happier that the old queen is back for her crown!!! cause really any guy that lauren ever had kristin blew him first. so while you cream yourselves with excitement let us take a walk down memory lane.



so do you think speidi is scared? cause im pretty sure kristin will chew them up and spit them out. and what hot boys will she hook-up with? oh the possibilities.

What The Fuck Patty?!

so i think april fools day was probably the perfect day for the damages finale. cause patty hewes could probably pull off the biggest april fools prank of all time. in fact, i think she just did. im still wrapping my head around it. ill admit i was slightly disappointed with some things. but for the most part i thought it was an amazing finale and like that most of the stories were wrapped up so next season can have a fresh start. im a little disappointed ellen didnt really shoot patty. but i accept that if she did it would have made things messy. if patty died the show wouldnt be as good and if she survived sending ellen off to prison would still be a pretty major loss for the show. but as upsetting as it is i cant say im entirely surprised. in an odd way throughout the show i kept getting the feeling that spending more and more time with patty was maybe causing ellen to reevalute the woman who once tried to kill her. so even though it doesnt entirely makes sense i felt it was somewhat believable that ellen forgave her. look at tom. patty has put him through all kinds of shit and hes still stuck by her. sure she hasnt tried to kill him...yet. but still patty does have some bizaare hold over people.

its funny but even though the show didnt exactly end on a nail biting cliffhanger i still have tons of questions. im assuming ellen will be back next season but im intrigued to find out about this new job and if shell ever work with patty again. and what about frobisher? he seems to have gotten away with having those men kill david which is upsetting. having ellen kill patty would have been mostly unacceptable. but offing frobisher? i think patty would have been proud. anyway i hope wes is back. i assume hes the guy ellen was talking about but knowing this show come next year we'll find out shes dating oh i dont know....frobisher maybe??

so what did you guys think? hope we get some sort of resolution as far as the fact that purcell didnt actually kill his wife? did you love watching patty kick her son out and even better sending him to live with his new mommy? i have to say it was probably my favorite part of the whole show even though i thought it was oddly touching that michael said he couldnt leave cause he was the only man she had left. though i do think that was probably total bullshit. and what about maddox? are you hoping she returns next year as pattys new partner? cause even though she wasnt in the finale i totally thought she and patty were gonna go into business together when claire ratted kendick out. can you imagine?!?!?

Series 3 Of Skins Is Over. But On The Upside Kurt Wild Has A New Blog. Sadly He's Not Naked On It. I Think Skins Is Being A Bad Influence On Him.

so i watched the last two episodes of skins.....nowhere near as good as series one. not sure what i expected from this series but i did come into it with an open mind. but the granny race, pepper contest, and the serious lack of nudity when cookie was supposedly so keen to get his kit off really dragged this season down. and then every other minute i was forced to watch two chicks get it on which is totally lost on a gay guy. i just kept wondering how they "do it". cause i didnt see them bring any dildos into those woods. unless they were smuggling them in they're pussies. but anyway i wouldnt say this series was horrible just not excellent. in my opinion it was totally close to being as good as series 2. and again it helps that no one died. though cooks father did come close to killing him. speaking of i have to ask. considering they made us wait a whole series to learn about cooks family was this really the best they could do? sure it was interesting. and i totally wanted to blow cookie to make him feel better when his dad threatened to burn his face off. but still. they should have covered all this back in the beginning instead of cooks boring birthday party. then i might have found it more engrossing. but after all this time it didnt really tug at my heart strings the way all the shit with the parents in series one did. at least jj was his usual adorable and funny self. effie should just run off with him. anyway series 3 may not have been mind-blowing (seriously though no blow jobs in sight. the faggy emo had to settle for his hand.) but im totally watching series 4. lets just hope theres more nudity. cause that will totally help. and even if it sucks we can just look forward to the fact that come series 5 these bitches will all be gone and we'll get a new crop of bi-curious brits to play with.

moving on. are you out there moji? im sure you've already discovered this but just in case you havent kurt wild, bottom extraordinaire, has a blog! heres the exclusive interview he did for it.



i guess hes always a bit nervous. he probably only cums out of his shell when hes getting fucked with a big cock. in fact i think he should do all his interviews with a butt plug from now on to loosen him up and make him less nervous. would you like to be his butt plug moji?

anyway hes super adorable but he needs more cock on his blog. but then again everyone needs more cock on their blog. fuck you all!

So Much Shit To Talk About

so first off i will not be doing an official recap of the most recent skins. until we get some nudity back on the show consider me bored with it all. well, no, not bored. actually this was probably one of the best episodes yet since cookie monster managed to scare the shit out of everyone and reveal all their secrets causing effy to nearly kill the straight twin which of course ended with her going on the lam with cook. basically every thing is shit now. but without a nice flash of cooks sexy ass while he was fucking effy, or a flash of freddies ass while he was fucking effy, or really just a flash of anyones ass while they were fucking effy does any of that other shit even matter? no. it doesnt.

but it must be said that cook kind of comes out looking like the hero after this mindfuck of an episode. sure hes a wanker but if you consider that all the people who claim to find his behavior so horrible are either cheating on or want to cheat on their significant other cookie monster doesnt seem so bad. and when the shit has hit the fan who can effy turn to? freddie? nope. cook. so if i were effy i would get over that emo fag and start yanking cookies balls as a thank you. cause we all know how much he loves it when you pull his balls.

but dont even get me started on gossip girl. chuck and the hooker? really? serena wants to fuck a fag? i knew that guy was gay the moment he opened his mouth and cum spilled out. and why was it necessary for all the misunderstandings between nate and vanessa? if that episode where chuck tried to seduce v taught me anything its that vanessa isnt boring. her boyfriend just makes her seem boring. ever since he stopped trying to fuck his friends little sister the pretty pink penis has been seriously putting me to sleep. maybe putting it back in blair will fix things. like maybe he can get his clothes off again?

whatever. skins and gossip may not be giving me wood at the moment but here are some pics that are.

so this is really hot. and really gay. because basically organized sports is a conspiracy concocted by sports physicians, masseuses, and coaches to get really buff guys in all sorts of compromising positions. how much you want to bet athletes get weekly prostate exams? and yet this photo is no where near as gay as the next one.


now this is a gay photo. a blonde twink, a gay blow up doll, and a tranny.



even this guys think elliot tittensor looks gay.


so gay hes tempted to stick two fingers up the bitches ass. and elliots so excited he can stop himself from reaching for his cock.


if anyone knows who this is please tell me cause i tried googling him and i have no idea.



so this is a vid of that gorgeous straight boy from summer storm getting his ass spanked. its long and violent but so boner worthy. no actual sex but looking at this guys ass for ten minutes was enough to get me hard.

Freddie's Fucking The Straight Twin, Cookie Monster's Fucking Panda, Gay-J's Fucking The Gay Twin, and Everybody's In Love With Effie.

and nothing seems to make sense except that gay-j drinks cum when he gets over stressed. well actually its mango juice but even that seems gay to me.

so last i checked all the pairings seemed pretty straightforward. freddie and cookie in a love triangle with effie. naomi and the gay twin fucking. the straight twin snogging the sexy footie player. panda back with thomas after what seemed to be a one time thing with cookie. and jj of course not fucking anyone. but then a week passed and all the cocks and pussies hit the fan. and when they fell back down to the ground they were all mismatched. its all so confusing. lets see if i can try and explain.

so first we have freddie and the straight twin. in the past they've barely acknowledged each other but now they're fucking.


then theres panda and cookie monster. by the looks of it panda has gotten over thomas and is sneaking around with cook. cant say i blame her.


but cookie monster is still addicted to the cock which is why hes giving freddie a blow job. and hes so cum hungry he doesnt even notice jj.


and when gay-j found out about all of this he was angry cause everyones lying to each other and its all so confusing.


but i was too busy staring at cookie monster grabbing his cock to care about all of this.



and theres this for the pit lovers.


and heres cookie monster making weird faces. faces where his lips are parted so you could easily slip something in his mouth.




and here he is asking gay-j for a blow job. because even though hes fucking pretty much everyone on the show hes just never satisfied.


and here is gay-j staring at cooks cockie monster in awe because its just so big.


so i think this was a really good episode which isnt surprising since i love gay-j. plus all the bed hopping made things very interesting. and yet with all this fucking there was still no nudity.

as always you can find more caps over at fitmales and watch the show here. though it must be said that if one of the guys doesnt get his kit off soon i may have a fit like jj.

Make A Supermodel Fuck Me

so how do we feel about the new season of make me a supermodel? the guys are definitely hot but im not sure they're nearly as hot as last years guys. brendan was my favorite until he opened his mouth and then i just wanted to stick my cock in it to shut him up. which is usually not the reason i want to stick my cock in someones mouth.


this years androgynous model is definitely not as hot as last years. i miss casey. did anyone ever figure out if he was gay or not? cause my ass was really hoping he was. and this years gay guy whatever his name is, the one thats old and married is nowhere near as hot as ronnie. and i doubt anything any of them do this season will be anywhere near as hot as the casey/perry photo shoot which left me covered in cum.



and i dont think brendand and chris will be any competition for bronnie.



other than the photo shoot i was mostly bored. though in the preview for next week it seems brendan is taking it all off. so i guess theres that cumshot to look forward to at least. if you seek amy!

Cookie Monster Probably Would Try To Staple His Tongue To Naomi's Clit Except It's Already Stapled To Gay-J's Ass.

another week of skins. another week of straight boys acting like a bunch of cum hungry fags. and to think luke (aka freddie) actually said he wouldnt have a gay story this year. i dont think he realizes hes the biggest flamer on the show.

so freddie the gay emo was moping around because he felt like he lost his cockie monster.


but not to these blonde sluts cause we all know cook is a fudge packer.


no he lost him to gay-j.


and cook just made it worse by flaunting that gorgeous ass of his.


an ass that freddie would never again get to rim.


and those eyes. those gorgeous eyes hed never get to stare into as the cockie monster fucked him into oblivion.


and that smile. oh that smile!


and cook was oblivious. he was too busy being a gay soldier. the best kind.


hes so pretty when he (almost) cries.


so yeah other than that not much going on. this week was devoted to the straight bisexual lesbian. see naomi kissed a girl and she liked it. and then she freaked out cause that girl kissed her on her other lips. basically it was all lez, lez, lez, pussy, pussy, pussy, munch, munch, munch. who gives a shit?!

next week is gay-j so im hoping he finally cums out. but its not likely since he seems to tell effie he loves her.

you can watch this weeks episode if you want but expect lots of girl on girl. which is one girl too many for me.

more caps at fitmales.

oh and heres cook and jj acting kinda gay in real life.



so does anyone think we'll ever get nudity back on skins?

Fucking Top Chef

they took jeff away. twice. they made carla cry. and worst of all they crowned that fucking cunt of a cheater top chef. fuckers.

No One Wants To Eat Freddie. Except Maybe Cook.

so skins was gayer than ever this week. not tony giving maxxie a blow job gay but definitely maxxie snogging a chav boy gay.

so this week we got to follow freddie the gay emo.


and the love triangle involving the three musketeers intensified.


but along with our gay there was some incest. like freddie realizing his sister is a sexxbomb.


personally i prefer these sexxbombs and there weapons of ass destruction.


but no. freddie wants to fuck his sister.


and here they are making out in a water park.


meanwhile my darling cookie monster was being his regular hot self. yet still no nudity.


isnt he just adorable? not an evil bone in his body.


here he is indulging in his tickle fetish with gay-j.


effie brought along her hot new plaything. whats his name again?


but lets get to the gay. here is cookie monster showing freddie just how much he loves him.


gay-j cant watch. gay-j is heartbroken.


and everything was perfect until this moment. this moment when freddie saw his darling cookie monster about to fuck effie.


it hurt him. it hurt him so much it made him bleed.


so he decided to run away.


the end.

so next week is our lesbian/bisexual/straight girl. she seems to be cookie monsters next conquest. cause it wasnt enough for him to fuck effie, panda, gay-j, freddie, and his sister.

so can you watch this amazing episode here. itll say theres only 11 minutes but the whole episode is there. i assume its some sort of glitch.

more caps at fitmales. the greateset blog ever cause it captures skins gayest moments. and the incestiest ones too.