Thursday, January 29, 2009

My Boyfriend's Not A Dickhead. He's A Fucking Cunt.

i believe this feeling im having is called being livid. yes. i am livid. why? okay so abs best friend is this this this douche nozzle (in fact lets call him dn) hes known since they were kids. and dn is a whore. on every occasion that ive seen him hes fucking a different girl. now ab spends a lot of time with him. if hes not with me hes likely with dn. and ab even admitted he used to have a crush on him when they were younger. but hes straight so i didnt really care. so yesterday we're on our way to my place but we had to stop by dns because ab needed to get something or other from him. so we get there and as we're walking up to the door you can tell someones getting a blowjob. he was moaning and saying "yeah come on. oh yeah. im close" so ab and i figure hes getting a blowjob and since he was so obviously close wed wait until he was finished. so we do. and when hes obviously done i knock cause im tired of waiting. and guess who walks out? some blond twink. wiping cum off his lips. wtf?! so we got what we needed and left and dn didnt seem embarrassed in anyway. which meant he obviously wasnt some closet case pretending to be straight. so in the car i asked ab what was up. and he said dn was kinda bi-curious or whatever and had hookep up with a couple of guys. and im like how long have you known this? and hes like a while. he never hid it from me. what?! but you hid it from me?! ass fucking cunt shit for brains! so this whole time i thought dn was just some hot nonthreatening straight guy hes actually some hot bi guy constantly hanging around my property!!! i mean boyfriend!

so then im like have you two ever fucked? and he swears no. and im like are you sure. and hes like i swear. well....and im like well what? im so mad at this point the only thing stopping me from killing him is the fact that hes the one driving. other wise i would have pulled over and i would not be writing this post. i would be deleting this blog and any other trace that i ever knew ab. ax would have to go. rm too cause he liked ab too much. and rmgf and i would have to figure out my various alibis. but like i said. ab was driving so that plan is on the back burner. for now......

so im like what the fuck does well mean?!?!?!! so hes like well that one time when ax and i fucked in the back of that car dn was the one driving. and he might have been rubbing his crotch. and he jerked off a little. so im like okay you were in a threesome with this dickhead? and hes like no it wasnt a threesome. he just kinda watched. we didnt touch or anything. nothing else ever happened i swear. hes so lucky i wasnt driving.

so the good news is im like 100% positive that dn is a top. i know you can never tell with these things but i just dont see that hole getting put to much use. and ab doesnt like anything going anywhere near his ass. not even a rim job which works for me cause, okay, even though ive mentioned wanting to go to town on a few delicious asses ive posted on here i really have no intention of ever putting my tongue back there. its....disgusting. unless its cristiano ronaldo. cause hes not like us. he doesnt use it to poop. his ass is merely for our viewing pleasure. kyle xy doesnt have a belly button and crissy doesnt have an asshole. anyway my point is good news two tops hot sex does not make. bad news. ab has to pay. dearly. and tying him up and giving him arguably the hottest sex of his life (cause im sooooo the best lay he'll ever have) is not gonna cut it. bitch has to pay. like really pay. for starters i have not spoken to him since yesterday. so. suggestions?

p.s. rm is in the dog house too. ab came over today so they could go hang out. ab gave me a "hey" and his puppy dog eyes but was smart enough not to approach me. i ignored him and left with rmgf to plot...nothing. anyway i asked her why she let rm get away with that. she apologized for not properly controlling her bitch and promised it wouldnt happen again. whatever. i need a new boyfriend.

4 comments:

Ryan said...

"If there's nothing to hide, why are you hiding something?"

I don't buy your boyfriend's story. In my experience, when someone hides something from you, and then decides to give you a "well" story - the "well" story is just something that they think you will believe. He knows you will never believe that nothing has happened, so he makes something up that is a little worse than nothing but not so horrible that you'll leave him. I think he's still hiding something.

J said...

i say lace his underwear with itching powder for a couple of days, i dont think anyone would want to sleep with him then.

Anonymous said...

were should I submit my resume for the potential opening in the boyfriend department?

dickophile said...

ryan - he might be. i havent decided yet. i still havent talked to him yet. and the last time i talked to him i was so angry i couldnt focus. i think i need to calm down and look him dead in the eye to tell if hes lying or not. but im not there yet. the only reason i havent broken up with him yet is cause this all happened in the past before we met. and there is a part of me that thinks hes telling the truth only because he always acted like this was an unrequited crush not someone he actually got to fuck.

j - i want to cause him pain. like real gut wrenching pain. itching powder wont do. think of something involving gags, wips, and nipple clamps. yeah. nipple clamps!

aj - email it. ill need dick measurements.